Reading Assignment: Matthew 19:1-12

Key Verse: Matthew 19:6

Main Idea/Truth: Marriage is for life.

Overview:

1. Marriage

2. Divorce

3. Celibacy/Singleness

Prayer Suggestions:

1. Thank God for the gift of marriage.

2. Express commitment to a lifelong marriage to your spouse.

3. Accept singleness as an opportunity to serve the Lord.

Transcript

Let’s pray and we’ll begin.

Lord, thank You for speaking to us. Thank You for Your holy word. We pray that You would teach us this morning and guide us. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen.

The next reading assignment is Matthew 19:1-12, and the main idea and the central truth here is this: marriage is for life. This is where Jesus teaches a lesson on marriage. God has a high view of marriage because He is the one who instituted marriage. The key verse is found in verse 6: “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” This topic of marriage is, interestingly, brought up by the Pharisees; Jesus doesn’t teach it out of the blue. Matthew tells us that Jesus had gone from Galilee to the southern region of Judea and beyond the Jordan, which means the east side of the Jordan river. There was a large crowd that had gathered around Him, and as usual, Jesus healed them and ministered to them. At this point, some Pharisees come to Jesus to test Him. They ask Him a question. They say, “is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” That's their question. It sounds rather absurd, but there's a background to this. The Pharisees actually believed that you can divorce your wife if she burnt your breakfast. We find things like this in the rabbinic literature from 200 AD. As well, if you just happen to find another woman more attractive, then you can also divorce your current wife and seek to marry that other woman. This is, of course, complete nonsense, and it is immoral behavior. But this is indeed their background, and they wanted to see whether Jesus would challenge the teaching of the rabbis. Jesus answered this question by appealing to Scripture. He asks them, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?” These are statements made in Genesis Chapters 1 and 2. God declared that He made humans, male and female; that’s Chapter 1. And then the purpose for their creation in two distinct genders is given in Chapter 2; it is so that they would come together in marriage. God declared it that a man shall be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh. This describes what happens in the sight of God when a man and a woman enter into the lifelong covenant of marriage. Jesus then expounds this second passage and explains that the married couple is no longer two, but one flesh. Then He tells us what this means: What, therefore, God has joined together, let no man separate. By the way, that's the key verse: “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Jesus explains that marriage is meant to be for life, and that when a man and a woman come together in the covenant of marriage, they become in the sight of God one flesh. Moreover, no man should ever sever this relationship. Only God has the prerogative to do that. He alone can end a marriage through death. This is because in the sight of God, marriage is for life. The Pharisees at this juncture, then, react to this and they ask, “Why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away?” This appears to be a go-to passage of the Pharisees to justify their no-fault divorce. Then Jesus also explains this about this Old Testament law and other parts that were given for people with a hardened heart toward God. Jesus says, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.” You see, the Israelites in the Old Testament were not born again. They had not become obedient to the Lord from the heart. And so, some of the commands were given to govern an unbelieving population who did not desire to worship the LORD and live by His word. What appears to be a permission for divorce in the law of Moses was actually meant to govern unbelievers. Having said that, even the law of Moses did not endorse a no-fault divorce. There had to be a legitimate cause for divorce. Moses never gave permission for men to divorce their wives for any reason at all as the Pharisees had taken it to mean.

Then Jesus adds one circumstance in which divorce is allowed. It is in the case of infidelity. He says, “whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality (or adultery), and marries another woman commits adultery.” There's only one basis upon which God would allow a man and a woman to separate. It is immorality; if there has been adultery, unfaithfulness in the matter of sex. Jesus gives this as one exception for divorce, but apart from infidelity, there is no ground for divorce, because marriage was always meant to be a lifelong covenant relationship. In the sight of God, the two people had become one flesh, and they were never to be separated. The one sin that could rupture that relationship is infidelity and that is it.

The disciples are shocked by this. They appear to have subscribed to the ideas of the Pharisees. They thought that Jesus’ teaching was too difficult to uphold. Probably people today would say the same thing. And so the disciples say, “If the relationship of the man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry.” This was probably the remark of those disciples who were married. Not all the disciples may have been married, but clearly Simon Peter was. You would recall, he had a mother-in-law that Jesus healed back in Matthew 8. And those who have been married recognize that in real life, there can be friction and tension between husband and wife and sometimes they have real difficulty getting along. And if in fact the relationship of a man with his wife is permanent and life-long, they say it is better not to marry. Then Jesus explains that there is actually provision for singleness or celibacy. He describes it in terms of a eunuch. But he goes on to say that this lifestyle is only for those whom God has providentially guided to a life of singleness. Jesus gives three examples how someone might become single for life. He says there are eunuchs who are born that way from their mother's womb. They're physiologically incapable of marrying. And then He goes on to say there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men. He is describing castration. And then there are also eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. This third category describes believers who have intentionally chosen to live single to serve the Lord and to advance the Lord’s cause in this world. Of course, this isn’t surprising. We find an example of this in the apostle Paul. He remained single to serve the Lord with a singular focus. Jesus concludes the matter by saying, “he who is able to accept this, let him accept it.”

What is the import of this? The whole import of this is simply this: as I said earlier, marriage is for life. We live in a world today where people are confused about this very fundamental idea of marriage. But God designed marriage, and we should not be confused about this at all. Jesus makes it very clear that, first of all, marriage is between a man and a woman. It is absurd that in our culture, people think that man and another man can enter into a marriage. There is no such a thing as homosexual marriage. God made it clear it is a man who is joined to his wife, literally, “his woman.” And it is these two who become one flesh, whom God joins together in His sight. It is male and female whom he joins. He created them in two genders for the purpose of the marriage union. Secondly, marriage is for life (or lifelong). The only means by which God will break a marriage is by death. The only other way that a couple is allowed to divorce is if there has been sexual immorality, if there has been adultery. Beyond this one provision, God's standard for marriage is permanence in marriage. This means that the law of the state of California is not what governs Christian marriages. You see, in 1970, California was the first state to put into law no-fault divorce. This was revolutionary at that time (though, since then, every state in the union followed suit and have also adopted the same law). But the point is this. Just because our state allows no-fault divorce does not make it right for Christians. We abide by the higher law of God, and in His sight, adultery is the only grounds for divorce. Apart from this, there is to be no divorce for the Christian. Why? Because marriage is for life. Furthermore, Jesus teaches us that singleness is also a manner of life for some and that some believers even choose singleness for the sake of God's kingdom, to serve the Lord. On this final note, I should also add that 1 Corinthians 7 has a whole section on biblical singleness for the purpose of serving the Lord without distraction. And so this is what we learn from this section: three ideas on marriage. First, God’s standard of marriage is for life; it is lifelong. Second, the only basis for divorce is immorality (or adultery). And third, there is provision for singleness.

What are some matters we can pray about? Well, first of all, we should thank God for the gift of marriage. God is the one who created Eve because He saw that it was not good for man to be alone. And so all of us who are married, we should be grateful to God for the companion He has given us for life. And we should cherish the spouse God has given us. The second thing is to be committed in our hearts before the Lord to love our spouses until death separates us. I would imagine that was everyone's vow when they got married. But this is indeed God's standard and we should absolutely uphold this standard of God. Thirdly, we should also recognize before the Lord that marriage is not the most important thing in life, that some people forgo marriage to serve the Lord and for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. This means we should not see marriage as the be all end all. Marriage is important. We should uphold marriage. But you know, if for whatever reason God takes our spouses, that is not the end of the world. We ought to recognize that life is meant to be lived to serve the Lord. And that if at any point God should take our spouses through death, we should not fall into a state of total despair and find no reason to live. No. We should live to serve the Lord. There is a reason to live even in the state of singleness, and Jesus shows us this in this passage. Alright, today is nice and short and sweet. Let me pray for us and we'll close.

God, thank You that You know all our needs. And even as You created Eve for Adam, You, by Your grace, so ordained that we would come together with the spouse You have given us, that we would experience the rich blessing of marriage and even the blessing of having children. Thank You, Lord, for enriching our lives with such a blessing from heaven. We also understand from Your word that marriage is for life. We pledge to not walk by the patterns of this world. We commit to faithfulness to our spouses, and that we will pursue a lifelong covenant with our spouses. Thank You, Lord, for also teaching us that there is a purpose for singleness. Indeed, some have remained single to serve You and for the advancement of Your kingdom. Teach us to value Your kingdom more than our own comforts and desires in marriage. Teach us, so that if You should ever make us to be single again, that we would not despair but that we would serve You heartily as singles. Serving You is the greatest privilege in life, and so teach us that wisdom. Thank You for Your holy word. Bless us this day and empower us to bear much fruit for Your glory. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen.

All right, Lord bless you all. And we are done for today.